Allow me to introduce myself
Welcome to what I’m hoping will be a new adventure in my life! Starting a blog has been an idea swirling in mind, gently whispering “Hey, you should start me.” since the pandemic started. When the world shut down and I could finally take the time to work on myself, the need for a space to express my ideas became imperative. In my day to day life I would define myself as someone who’s either talking too much or talking too little. I spend a lot of time in deep thought which leads me to either rushing to get all my ideas out or working through the mess in my head before I say anything. For this reason, journaling has been something I’ve turned to heavily in my life.
When I was kid I was actually pretty different. I would say the first thing that popped into my head. All impulse, no editing! “You smell bad. Smell me! I smell good!” “Boys have weird looking pee pees!” “You're ugly, but you can be my less pretty friend.” Clearly no consideration either. Family, friends, and teachers ended up not liking this attitude. It came back to bite me in the butt when I found myself playing alone in the school yard.
As kids, we tend to misinterpret the lessons our elders are trying to teach us, and my first big misinterpretation was that if I wanted to be a good friend, sister, daughter, student, person I would have to completely change who I was. I needed to put into practice stifling all of my natural impulses. They would without a doubt offend. If I wanted to be a good person, the last thing I wanted to do was offend. If only I had the knowledge then that I have now... Yikes! That was the recipe for severe social anxiety and depression. A decade of thinking like this led to my depression. Which led to some codependency. Which led to a mental breakdown in 2018. Which led to some much needed therapy and holistic healing. Which brings us to today! The girl who maybe talks to little or too much, but can make it all make sense in her writing.
This blog is gonna talk about the thoughts that have gone through my head during my healing process. Things like being BIPOC and attending a/multiple PWI’s, reparenting and healing generational trauma, all things occult (or “woo woo” as I like to call it), and my favorite topic of conversation, pop culture and how it relates to where our generation is mentally. It’s going to get personal, honey! But in my humble opinion the personal is never all that personal.
My hope is that we form a community here. Let’s get deep! Let’s have tough conversations. Although, the rule of conversation here is that you must welcome being wrong. This is not the space for pretension. This is not the space to hear your own voice. I personally, never want to advertise myself as someone who has all the answers. I sure as hell don't. At the end of the day, I just have what works for me. But hopefully through sharing what works for me, what's been happening in my life, you find something that works for you. I’m sure I will learn something from you, so make sure to share in the comments or reach out to me on social media. This is for all of us miseducated and all of us who missed the education. Again, Welcome!